Archive for the ‘Another Day…’ Category

Zen and the Art of Not Killing Yourself While Driving a Stupid Go-Kart

There is some genetic code in many males where they derive pleasure from navigating vehicles at maximum speeds. I lack this gene. I happen to enjoy being alive and having all my appendages in working condition so I’ve spent most of my life abiding posted speed limits, begging off invitations to go 4-wheelin’,1 and avoiding boats that go any faster than a canoe2. Continue reading


Tough Crowd

I don’t hate kids.

I talk a big game about how I don’t personally want to procreate, and how annoying kids are. I consistently rant about how people who are pregnant or parents of relatively young children post WAY too much on facebook about their fetuses/kids. As thrilled as I am about your ovaries getting a coat of whitewash, there’s nothing I care less about than how extended your stomach is, or your ultrasound, or how your kid said something stupid that you think is adorable. Why people think kids saying unintelligent things is cute or funny I will never know. Continue reading

My Trip to the Zoo: Part 2

The aquarium, giraffes and rhinos have been viewed, theories have been voiced and lessons have been learned. Now on to part two of my adventure at the zoo with my dad. Continue reading

My Trip to the Zoo: Part I

The Indianapolis Zoo, in what I can only regard as an attempt to bolster their reputation (which seemingly relies almost exclusively on artificially inseminating elephants) has added a few animals to their stable: the African warthog, the crested porcupine, and two different species of bat. Since I have an unnatural affinity for bats, and since it had been a long enough time since my last visit to let me forgot how much zoos depress me, I decided it would be a great idea to go, and I took my dad along. Here lies a synopsis of the trip. Continue reading