Archive for the ‘Sports Talk’ Category

I’m Sensitive About How Sensitive Other People Are


Before the most important game of the Pacers season (something I’ve said about nearly every game this series) I decided I would take a moment and talk about the thing everyone else is talking about, no homo-gate. I’ll be as concise as possible since the game happens to be occurring in 2 hours and I want people to have plenty of time to call me an oversensitive liberal asshole before tip-off. But isn’t typing a sentence saying you will be concise the very opposite of conciseness, Ryan? Shut up. Continue reading


Therapy Through the Written Word

Don’t feel too bad Kyle, Indiana’s weather sucks this time of year.

One of the two sport’s teams I give a shit about lost about an hour ago. I watched it in a bar where every other person was either apathetic to the whole thing or were cheering for the other team. The latter were naturally very happy. They cheered and gave each other high fives as they ordered victory shots to pour down their throats between yelps of passionate exuberance. I sat dejectedly sat in my seat, getting glanced at by an apathetic couple like I was in an exhibit. I don’t freak out much when my teams lose so they did not get to witness the show I could tell the guy was aching to see (I think the girl felt sorry for me). Continue reading

The Road to Indianapolis: Pros and Cons for the NFC South

The NFC South is arguably my least seen division in football this year (excluding the Saints), but if you think that will make me any less loud and obnoxious about my opinions of them then you are wrong. Continue reading

The Road to Indianapolis: Pros and Cons for the AFC East

I had someone recently tell me I should not do the rest of the leagues pros and cons because I had done the the ones that mattered: NFC West (because my favorite team is in it), AFC South (because the vast majority of people I know like the Colts), and NFC North (because it was the best division until I said how tough Jay Cutler was and he got injured). I tried to explain to my friend that I very rarely come up with original ideas so I need these 4 weeks of pros and cons to fill gaps…even if no one cares about them. He seemed to have more faith in my abilities to spin things that are all over every other NFL blog in a semi-humorous way, and for his confidence I thank him. Continue reading

The Road to Indianapolis: Pros and Cons for the NFC North

This week’s pros and cons list will focus on the NFC North, which for my money is the best division in football. I consider them the best division for a few reasons. The team atop this division is 9-0 and the team in third would be either tied or in sole possession of first place in 3 of the other 5 divisions. If the payoffs started today this division would have both Wildcard teams coming out of it. Even the bottom-dwelling Vikings aren’t that bad. If they were in a division that wasn’t as tough I’d bet they’d have more than 2 wins. Continue reading

The Road to Indianapolis: Pros and Cons for the AFC South

Due to the overwhelming majority of my readership being Colt’s fans (roughly 7 out of the 9 people), I decided to do the AFC South this week to make them actually interested in reading it. I’m sure they are on the edge of their seats wondering what hilarious jest I have pointed towards their lowly boys in blue. I also talk about the Titans and two other teams nobody really cares about. Let’s just be honest, the Texans will never climb out of the Cowboys shadow, and Florida doesn’t give a damn about the Jaguars. Nobody would care about the Titans, but Tennessee doesn’t really have anything else going for it.

I guess what I’m really trying to express is that Florida, Tennessee, and Texas are terrible places. One looks like the outline of a sedimentary rock, one tries to kill every single person who breaks the law within her borders and is the entrance point to the single biggest threat to this great nation (killer bees), and one wishes it could be a gigantic golf course so rich white assholes have something to do when they aren’t too busy oppressing women and minorities.

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The Road to Indianapolis: Pros and Cons for the NFC West

I’m back from my personal bye week with a plan to have something to write about for at least the next six weeks. I’ll do this Pros and Cons thing for all the divisions and when I get done hopefully my sluggish brain will have thought of something new. I decided to start with the NFC West because it’s not close at all and unless the 49ers collapse epically there is really not going to be much drama down the stretch. They are literally 1 win away from having the same amount of wins that the Seahawks went to the playoffs with last year. Continue reading